Here are some of the best Halloween dad jokes to have a fun time with adults.
Moreover, these Halloween jokes on dad include dirty, worst, stupid one liner jokes.
Pick suitable Halloween jokes that fit your mood or situation.
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Happy Halloween…!!!
Halloween Jokes For Adults
If Dracula were a furry, what would his name be?
A: Nos-fur-atu.
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What did the skeleton tell her husband on Halloween?
A: I would rattle your bone any day of the year.
Why do witches make the best wives?
A: They promise a great s*x life.
What kind of food would you find on a haunted beach?
A: A sand-witch!
What do Targaryens and gourds have in common?
A: They both pump-kin.
Why won’t monsters eat ghosts?
A: Because they taste like sheet.
What do you call two witches who live together?
A: Broom-mates!
Who helped the little pumpkin cross the road?
A: The crossing gourd.
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
A: Because he had a bone to pick.
Where did the skeleton keep his money?
A: In the crypt-o market.
Halloween One-Liners
What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A broom closet.
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What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
A: Squash.
Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: Because he had bat breath.
What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
A: Coffee with scream and sugar.
What do ghosts eat for dinner?
A: Spooketi.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A: A blood orange.
Why did the mummy become a detective?
A: Because he was good at “unraveling” mysteries.
Who are some of the werewolves’ cousins?
A: The whatwolves and the whenwolves.
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
A: Frostbite!
Why did the ghost need a Band-Aid?
A: He had a boo boo.
Dirty Halloween Jokes One-Liners
What does the devil have between his legs?
A: He has great balls of fire.
Why was the ghost dad wearing a dress on Halloween?
A: He was a trans-parent.
What is Dracula’s porn star name?
A: Vlad the Impaler
Why can’t the ghost have any children?
A: He has a Halloweenie.
Why do Halloween ghosts tremble, moan and shiver?
A: Because of what’s happening under that sheet.
How do skeletons make babies?
A: They bone.
What is a vampire’s favourite part of s*x?
A: Edraculating
What did the vampire say to the teacher?
A: See you next period.
What do vampires use to make tea?
A: Tampons.
How do two skeletons have s*x ?
A: By boning all night long.
Why won’t monsters eat ghosts?
A: Because they taste like sheet.
What’s unique about s*x with vampires?
A: They only come at night.
Worst Halloween Dad Jokes
What do you get when you burn a monster in Budapest?
A: Hungarian ghoul ash.
Why do ghosts speak Latin?
A: Because it’s a dead language.
What do short-sighted ghouls wear?
A: Spooktacles.
What’s a ghost’s favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Little BOO Peep.
What does a ghost do when he gets in the car?
A: Puts on his sheet belt.
Why do ghosts hate rainy Halloweens?
A: It dampens their spirits.
Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
A: No body.
Why is Dracula so easy to fool?
A: Because he’s a sucker.
How do monsters like their eggs?
A: Terror-fried.
Who won the dance contest at the Monsters’ Ball?
A: The Boogie Man.
Why wouldn’t Dracula’s kids laugh at his jokes?
A: Because they all sucked.
Stupid Halloween Dad Jokes
Where do college vampires like to shop?
A: Forever 21.
Where does Dracula keep his money?
A: A blood bank.
What’s a vampire’s least favourite meal?
A: Steak.
What do you call a vampire in trouble?
A: A grave problem.
Why do vampires love baseball?
A: They turn into bats every night.
Why didn’t the boy’s mother dress up for halloween?
A: She was already a mummy.
What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A: A sand-witch.
What is a witch’s favourite makeup?
A: Ma-scare-a.
Why do ghosts go to the pub?
A: For boos.
What do ghosts love to drink?
A: Ghoul Aid.
Why are ghosts terrible liars?
A: Because you can see right through them.
Why do ghosts go to theme parks?
A: They love roller-ghost-ers.
What do female ghosts sing on Halloween?
A: Ghouls just want to have fun!
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