Here are the best ghost jokes to have fun with kids and adults this Halloween season.
Moreover, these ghost jokes feature dirty, clean one liners to make everyone LOL.
Happy Halloween…!!!
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Short Ghost Jokes
What did the ghost buy at the bar?
Boos!
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What kind of horse do ghosts ride?
A night-mare.
Who did the ghost take to prom?
A ghoul-friend!
How does a ghost unlock a door?
With a spoo-key.
Where do ghosts buy their clothes?
At a boo-tique!
Why do ghosts love elevators?
It lifts their spirits.
Where do ghosts go on vacation?
The Boo-hamas.
When do ghosts drink coffee?
In the moaning.
Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store.
What’s a ghost’s favorite play?
Romeo and Ghouliet.
How do ghosts stay in shape?
By exorcising.
One Liners Ghost Jokes
Ghosts love astrology—they always read their horror-scopes!
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The bartender told the ghost they don’t serve spirits after midnight.
Are you a ghost? Because you look like my boo!
The ghost got lost in the fog and now he is mist.
Ghosts stay safe by buckling their sheet belts!
A ghost’s motto is: Eat, drink, and be scary.
Ghost kids know not to spook unless spoken to.
Dull ghosts are so boo-ring!
Ghosts’ favorite dessert is ice scream.
The ghost went to the theater to see a phantomime!
Ghost Jokes For Kids
What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces?
A toastie ghostie.
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Where does a ghost go on vacation?
Mali-boo.
Where did the ghost go on holiday?
The Boohamas.
Where the ghost go on holiday the next year?
Lake Eerie.
What did the mama ghost say to her baby?
Fasten your sheet belt.
How did Scrooge end up with the football?
The ghost of Christmas passed.
What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
I scream.
What’s a ghoul’s favorite bean?
A human bean.
What do you call a truly funny ghost comedian?
Dead funny!
What position do ghosts play on the field?
Ghoul-keeper.
What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
Sham-boo!
What do ghosts do at sleepovers?
Tell scary human stories.
What day do ghosts love to do their scaring?
On Fright-day.
What’s a ghost’s favorite type of fruit?
Boo-berries!
What does a ghost eat with meatballs?
Spook-etti.
What game do ghosts play?
Hide and shriek.
How do ghosts take their eggs?
Terri-fried.
How do ghosts cry when they’re sad?
Boo-hoo!
What kind of street does a ghost live on?
A dead end.
Which ghost is the best dancer?
The Boogie Man.
What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
Pillowcases.
What’s a ghost’s favorite tree?
Ceme-trees!
How do ghosts send letters?
Through the ghost office.
Why was the ghost embarrassed?
He had a boo-ger.
Ghost Jokes For Adults
Why did the monster go inside the bar?
For the boos.
What’s a skeleton’s favorite board game?
Tibial Pursuit.
What is the witch’s favorite crime show?
America’s Most Haunted.
Why do skeletons make good comedians?
They are two humerus.
Why is the woman afraid of the vampire?
Because he is all bite and no bark.
Why do cemeteries have walls and fences?
Because people are always dying to get in.
Where should I go to learn about bones?
Osteoclass
What do skeletons call a raging fun party?
An osteoblast!
What is a vampire’s worst fear?
Tooth decay.
I heard there is a skeleton in your closet?!
No, the body hasn’t decomposed yet.
Why are pumpkins better than men?
Every year you get a fresh crop to choose from.
What did the boy ghost ask his father?
Do humans really exist?
Why did the headless horseman start his own business?
To get ahead in life.
Dirty Ghost Jokes
Why can’t the ghost have any children?
He has a Halloweenie.
Why do witches wear no panties?
To get a better grip on the broom.
Why are male ghosts attracted to female ghosts?
Because of their boo-bies.
Why do Halloween ghosts moan, tremble, and shiver?
Because of what’s happening under that sheet.
I’m not going as a ghost this year, but you can still get under my sheets.
Why can’t the ghost have any children?
He has a Halloweenie.
Why are male ghosts attracted to female ghosts?
Because of their boo-bies.
Why don’t witches have babies?
Their husbands have crystal balls.
Why do the witches hate hanging out with the headless horseman?
He’s obsessed with getting head.
Why do witches wear no p@nties?
Or better grip on the broom.
Why do witches make great wives?
Because they promise a wonderful hex life.
What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance?
The muenster mash!
What’s the most popular dating app for skeletons in 2020?
The Bone Zone.
How do two skeletons have s*x?
By boning all night long.
Why do skeletons enjoy s*x with dainty women?
They like to bone a petite.
How do skeletons make babies?
They bone.
Clean Ghost Jokes
What did the parent ghosts say to their kids before a road trip?
Fasten your sheet belts!
Why are Ghosts in such good shape?
Plenty of exorcise and a good die-t.
Why are ghosts and demons so close? Demons are a ghoul’s best friend.
How does a Ghost say good-bye?
I can’t wait to seance you again.
Why didn’t the ghost dance at the party?
He had no body to dance with.
Where do Ghosts travel to for a holiday?
South Aarghfricaargh.
Why didn’t the ghost eat his candy?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
What room does a ghost not need in a house?
A living room.
What’s a ghost with a broken leg called?
A hoblin goblin.
What’s a ghost’s favorite makeup to wear?
Mas-scare-a!
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